Monthly Archives: December 2010

Another Own Goal …

Seasons Greetings

The week that brought the two most watched television programs in the British Isles to a close, first when Matt Cardle beat that teenage terror Cher Lloyd out of the winning position, not that he with his continuous sleazy front is in any way the better person, or even the better performer but the so called public vote all wanted him. Then there is the strictly hoofers slot from the twinkle toes brigade of revived has been’s and the next generation of forgettable wannabes. And the Lucky Winner is Kara Tointon and isn’t she a lot easier on the eye than any from the exploit the mentally challenged fudge factor stables.

The weather has again managed to bring out a plethora of very iffy excuses for non participation and non delivery. A thick blanket of snow at the start of the month and then a mini thaw and the excuses were still cascading out even in the thaw, who do you think you are kidding Mr Fiddler. Every other country that ever gets heavy winter conditions manages to keep all of their services running but in this country, the level of anarchy and the will to shy off is always just under the cover of the weakest excuses. The fact that most schools take the same view and will close their doors at the drop of a snow flake (great for the kids) forcing mothers/fathers that work to stay home to attend their children and the national turnover does suffer.

Could it be that the way that banks help themselves to our cash as they please then bill the government for additional support as and when they please while giving themselves hefty bonuses as and when they see fit, and could it be that in the land where employers have the whole workforce over a collective barrel and with the aid of governmental legislation are stripping the workers rights to the barest minimum have anything to do with the seeming collective shift in willingness to an understated belligerence to play along in a rigged game. Hmm worth a second look may be.

The general grumblings from the rank and file are still about what is being done by the banks and by a non elected government team of voting hijackers. The contempt from the con-dem-nation corner is having the opposite effect from the one the coalition expects. The collective corrosive effect of just one too many white washes, the indigestible propaganda that is flannelling the media and press pages is forcing this nation to think about a change of diet.

It has to be said the harsh truth is very unpalatable, and that every nation in the world is used to watering it down or taking it in sound byte sizes to make it more digestible, the nations of the world that all voted with their feet when the imminent collapse first showed its ugly features are the ones to blame, the nature of the political beast has not changed and shows no signs of remorse, just like the upper echelons of the banking systems, they are just exactly what they are. No the blame cannot be laid at their door.

They were all given this cart blanche when every worker took a cut in hours to keep their own head above water, when whole workforces took a cut in pay to keep their business afloat for the short term crisis of the initial rapids in the early stages of the white water knuckle ride that is still on going. This sent a clear signal to the powers that wannabe that you would all take a hit to keep a lying, cheating, backstabbing system in place rather than bring it to the point of having to change for lack of support. A system that has never delivered what it has always promised on the tin, that when it uses crooked practices can never deliver a growth mechanism when the order of the day is to undermine the opposition, to under bid the realistically priced bid that includes, good materials, correct time scales, adhering to legitimate building practices and still paying a fair price for labour and skilled professionals to do the best job possible. Funny how this is never a factor in the bidding process isn’t it. Well every worker that sold out for the short term gain has condemned the unemployed to becoming third class citizens soon to be conscripts of the new social class enforcement policies, the ‘if you want to live today, you will do as we say’ slogan of totalitarian rule over the sediment that falls to the bottom every time, will replace the ten pounds extra on top of your dole if you contribute to the ‘there are no jobs but we feel better if you are not just hanging around idle and we will feel safer knowing what you are up to at least during the day’ philosophy of the old brigade dinosaur mind-set.

Did no one tell you that when people take less pay or cut their hours and earn less pay, there is less money to spend and so less goods and services will be bought. The whole idea that by taking a hit there is the one thing that should never have been done, now the weather is compounding the problem. Flights are being cancelled and this is reducing the hours that flight staff and ground crews can earn in the run up to X-Mass.

The whole thing has been approached much like the eighteenth century approach to illnesses, and that is to treat the symptoms and let the disease continue in the hope that it will run its course, not a bad thing if the illness is a cold, but the more complex the disease the more complex the solution and there is no panacea for all illnesses as we all know. The short term solution to take a minor hit to keep ailing businesses heads above water was ok for the first set of rapids, but as any white water rafting fan will tell you the best is yet to come.

So in the face of such delayed problems still to rear their ugly heads as the reduced spending takes its toll in the second bite of the illness and the raft turns the corner of the new year into the gauntlet of the next rapids that are a downward set of steps that are impossible to climb back up from the fact that water will always decent to the lowest point in any landscape and will wash anything caught in its wave or wake with it as its headlong rush drags the flotsam and the jetsam through the obstacle course of rocks and wrecks it should be an exhilarating ride for the stout hearted but it may prove more than a little fatal for the heartless, the weary or the down trodden, still nature is known to be the best natural euthanasia device we have as it takes life from the weak and makes stronger all that succeed in running the gauntlet. The cold used to be the test of age and fortitude, while disasters do bring about a high percentage of miraculous survivors.

See you on the other side, and remember you all did this to all of us when you bit the short term solutions built.

In the mean time while we are in this nice cul-de-sac under the seasonal blanket of snuggle and be merry, have a very merry X-Mass when it comes and let the cards fall where they may in the New Year, for one and all.

Please hold, you are in a que….

Thank you for waiting. Your call is important to us.

Do you ever get the idea that you live in a world that is built for someone else’s convenience and not yours. A bit like being a left handed person in a right handed world, and everything is made for the average sized person and you are always below average. Sorry of unique proportions and individual tastes, but never run of the mill just off the production line Mr or Mrs Average.

Take for instance the handiest tool of the new age the mobile phone, what a marvellous toy what a great invention. The modern VHS smart phone knocks the old Betamax, land line right out of the stratosphere.

It comes with the full application store facilities that take full advantage of the built in ear piece and the almost obligatory lens and camera application. The extendable memory makes it an ideal local store for applications, multimedia files, images and music, what a piece of engineering.

The whole idea that the microphone is an ideal tool for a Dictaphone for the man or woman on the move, the video camera is a record keeper for the dude in the know or in the flow, the camera is the perfect mobile photo album maker has all been further enhanced by the plethora of exotic application that go that little bit further.

The heart monitor that uses the microphone and the graphic capability to display the rhythm is a leap in the right direction for the mobile health checker, for injuries and illnesses. The list is almost endless for the isolation checkers means to knowing or checking all in one simple device, and not the least of which for the next generation of music wizards the ubiquitous guitar tuner, the list goes on and on and on.

Funny though sometimes this sort of overlord stratosphere of the godlike in the sky is a bit worrying and more than a little creepy that someone off the radar will dictate the terms of our lives, just because they provide a service that services our innate laziness and facilitates our need for convenience now.

Still how do they fund this well in the old days you could buy an answer phone and it allowed someone to call you and after a preset number of rings it would automatically accept the call and it would only cost the caller a few pence to leave a sixty second message. Nowadays the service is not available except through the provider who charges for the call and then gets a second byte of the apple by billing you to listen to the messages, yet in this day and age of the smart phone with a microphone and the ability to record voice and the handy facility to save sound files to the memory, not one company has thought to commission the building of an application that can monitor incoming calls and switch to local recording app. This could be set to direct to voicemail if you are in a meeting on silent so you still know to check when you leave the meeting but that doesn’t get the second byte of the apple, hmmmm is that a coincidence or …………

It’s not even as if you have a choice in the matter unless an independent company comes up with this get rich quick app for all mobile phone services and operation systems, this is a real gap in the market and yet no one is rushing to fill it. Hmmm.

Ever tried switching off your answer phone services once they have been started, awe must just be a coincidence then isn’t it.

The we know where you are at all times anywhere on the planet GPS chip services make is an absolute essential tool for the creepy new age Big brother we have our eye on you new governmental snoopers. That when it is linked to the cash card of the future and the new building scanners services that will update a global PIR (Person In Room) style 3D tracking system just in case any of our sheep is missing, awe isn’t that so nice of them.

It certainly paints a different picture of a much more paranoid future for the common man at the hands of the elite minority that rule. Makes you wonder when you consider just how long certain pieces have been around in the woodwork, the sensor PIR has been around for decades the drive for 3D mapping and resource management and database tracking has been relentless and the advent of GPS has brought the whole thing right out of the comic books and the pages of science fiction novels right onto the present pageant of every day life for the lab rats on prison planet earth.

On the One Hand ……

The Clunking Fist

The question that should be asked about the governments handling of absolutely everything is how did it all come to this in the first place.

Students rioting on the streets, are just compounding the errors of their own ways, they after all voted in a rigged system that has never delivered and never will, they rather than before the fact are now after the fact having to pay the pound of flesh for the laziness  of not taking action to prevent a rigged vote from ever producing yet another delinquent government that will always say whatever it takes to get back into power and then do as they please once they are in, like change the four year term of office and make it into a five year one without legislation to legitimise it. Like do U-turns on understood manifesto pledges to backers, supporters and to voters.

This country to a man woman and a child had the chance to take back some of the responsibility of the weight of the collective and to stop day dreaming that this crumbling system can still do what it promises and has claimed and promised to deliver for more than two hundred years, and all it has ever really done in the wake of each election is to let their own in and to put on the nose bag and to do as they please. We all had the chance to take back the power to not vote in the elections but still the greedy minority that it actually works for the greedy few keep bolstering up the bastions of the cold war relics and the ice veined blood of the decaying dinosaurs to keep pumping round the collection hat to collect taxes that go straight to banks, while troops still have to live with shortages as the cull the unemployed campaign gets into second gear. All this as the educational system that used to be the envy of the world has to watch a government shirk its responsibilities to use our money to fund our needs and not to just cut themselves a bigger wedge from the take from the poor plate. The debt ridden paradigm of the make them pay brigade of old fossils say hit them with a bill that will stop ‘them’ cluttering up the educational establishments, saddle them with a bill that will be used to fund the system that they have slashed the funding for by eighty percent.

For every person that took low pay, in the recession, for every person that took a cut in hours to keep their jobs for every person whose choice was to preserve the status quo we will all now begin the long decades of enslaved tied debts, we have all been saddled by the greed of the many, harnessed to the greedy failed system that has never ever delivered, and can never ever deliver. All because the fearful bit the built, then aimed it at all our heads, instead of finding the courage to stand up for real change and to stand together and shoulder a little more of the burden on our own shoulders for maybe five years they opted to take the line of least resistance and in doing so condemned us all to decades of debt management, that no one in the middle belt will ever have to feel the same bite that the bottom layer of the pile will be chewed up and spat out by.

That has effectively condemned our children and maybe even our children’s children to a lifetime of debt and even more compounded misery to come, because it was easier to take a little hit in the short term, well thank you to all the short-sighted idiots and their limited thinking on how to turn a situation around in the face of adversity. I am sure our children will thank you and our grand children will thank you for nothing, for that is the legacy of your selfish actions, as the grab the power before it dissipates, coalition of the never get their chance if they don’t grab it now brigade of new politics, didn’t hijack the dismal voting returns to make something out of nothing. Now they steal from Paul and short-change Peter as they prove that they cannot balance the books any better than the jobs for the boys battalion of reds in the beds did, with their top heavy control orientated attempt at ruining running a country. One ran the country into the ground and now the mismatched bromance of the new century look likely to compound the injuries, the muppets of the west end farce are now all well situated to knocking it all to down after the red hand of the clunking fist set the whole thing up so that the lazy, short sighted worry warts could slam into the blind sided setup, that was laid there waiting for the knee jerk reaction to the runaway trains main glairing lights as it pressed down on the poor wee trapped animals in its headlamp, and the knee jerk worked a treat.

So the left and right hand of politics did the old one two on the gullible and it still works like a charm. The red handed slap from the clunking fist, slapped the unwary into the descending fist of the clenched coalition low blow. One set it all up the other knocks it all down again.

This proves without a shadow of a doubt that the common man has not the wit nor the understanding to be deserving of the right to vote, most idiots out there just do what they have always done, well that’s a no brainer, while the self preservation mob all vote for what has worked for them in the past, so no change there then is there. Greed and ignorance hand in hand on the slippery slope to hell, with all the right ‘good’ intentions of course.

This country may well be about to get its just deserts and the awful shame is the solutions have always been there from the beginning, if you do not vote they cannot rule. It is your power of attorney, your proxy, that you all give to them because you don’t want the responsibility and they keep proving that they will only ever use it to their own ends and not for our greatest needs.

Their behind you ……..

Oh yes they are ….

Oh Well Britain is settling down into the festive hibernation spirit under a winter blanket of snow and ice as yet again the weather defies predictions, cant imagine how that can happen in the land of the psychic medium, the corner store tarot readers and not to forget the very lucrative newspaper horoscope fakers. The weather forecasters are all showing better sense as they know they all use the same data models and its down to interpretation and unlike the most memorable Michael Fish incident they are all showing sense enough to stick to short term forecasts and to steer away from any long term ones, otherwise it will be more effective at producing a set of ruddy cheeks than stepping out in the big freeze. And just who could have seen that mini thaw, any ftakers out there.

Now at this time of year we are all looking for a good time despite the weather and the seasonal favourite is still the Pantomime, a big favourite for kids of all ages and sizes, but the biggest laugh must still be that old favourite the west end farce and the clowns in the condemn-nation corner. Nick ‘the Lady is not for turning’ did a very public twirl and dropped a couple of bloomers this week, as the big dog declares the troops will probably be home in 2011.


Talking about getting caught out (must be something in the weather) the shark attacks in Egypt are just a little to close to the Jaws films scripts to be enough like life imitating whatever passes for art these days. While a newly wed wife was murdered in Africa and more than a little unusually the husband escaped the situation ‘un-harmed’ and even though it all has a feel of being more than a little unreal, it is still a little early in the day to draw absolute conclusions before the court has had a chance to weigh up the facts and to track down the evidence, but the CCTCV footage and the whole fishy incident still leaves a very fishy smell in the air. After all who in their right mind lets one of the witnesses free to tell the tale or to finger you later, a real robber would definitely have shot the man then raped and killed the girl if rape was ever on their minds. So no matter what his incredible story is it still does not fit the profile for historic similar real situations.

They say they the authorities were just trying to plug the Wikkileaks drip, drip, drip of non information and to stem the flow of the runaway cables express. The very suspicious circumstances behind the resurrection of the dismissed allegations is again filling the virtual space with that unmistakable odour of rank fish yet again. The American liars are moving legislation mountains to again fast track legislation changes based on trump up charges. Nothing new there then is there after all in Britain some parties have been trying the same thing for the last few years, and the worst offence of the decade is the sight of the SAS storm troopers in public shopping malls armed to deal with armed terrorists as these mythical terrorists crank up their bombing raids and supposed public venue armed attacks, that have been plaguing this nation for almost a decade now. The German dictator started the same way, they checked people in the street and issued papers and documentation, under the disguise of tracking down the mythical baddies. The whole thing smacks of the type of effort used by the Neighbourhood watch coordinator who was vandalising her own neighbours cars, and has shown no real remorse.

The number of outrageous incidents has again taken a rise out of the back pages onto the front of the rags, like the woman that nearly drowned as she went to rescue her dog from a hole in the ice and fell in herself, lucky their was a camera person on hand to get the incident for us all to share. An American granny bit of her husbands tongue as he slipped it to her as she sat on the loo, cant imagine why duh…but it turns out the balance of her mind may be a little more than unhinged a little.

The unemployed are always the scape goat for the media that we are all scroungers and are all crooked, yet this week a brother and sister with a fortune of around four million pounds cheated the system for £130k and this is despicable and definitely whiffy affair, and proves that crooks are not all from the hard pressed downtrodden wingers and scroungers rank and file.

The mysterious incident of the Heir apparent and his detour out from under his eagle eyed handlers has more than a whiff of the odour of distinctive decaying scaly submersible denizen’s flesh. Oops one of our heirs is missing near the distinctive and completely well publicised and well attended police specials, with all the usual rowdies under the roving camera eye’s of the infiltration branch of modern media policing, and yet this car happened to stray into this ‘no man’s land’ hmmmmmm. Of course it did, then the gaff with the window and of course the handy man in the street POV (camera) of the whole stage acted incident that did not have the desired effect. Those royals are still a load of back stage johnnies and they do love a good old pageant, with shouts of ham directed dialogue such as ‘off with their heads’, ‘Torry scum’ being overshadowed with heckles from the real throng saying, ‘aright Charlie how’s it going man’, well just cant get the staff these days and as for script writers well. One needs a new dialogue coach at once. But most worrying of all was who in their right mind rolls down the window to so called armed attackers to try to reason with them, yeah nothing fishy there at all, but its safe to say ‘It’s all behind you now’, oh yes it is.

Still it is the festive season and we all like a good old panto, but I think it just has to be said the lame script writers and the poorly staged antics of the upper class twits trying to artificially steer public outcry has once again backfired on the lesser know twit when caught out of his natural habitat.

No Fairy Tale

What the Shrek

Hello Princess Fiona, hate to be the bearer of bad news but…an imp has mucked you over wake up and take a look, it’s not your script it’s a comedy book. Yeah this clunky knight, has been substituted for a heroes worthy might. And it must be said the plot isn’t very sane and yeah he’s verging on the wrong side of very plain.

I know he isn’t too bright, but if you pose him and just set him right. He can be an attractive centre piece, but do remember he is on loan and keep up the payments on his lease. It goes without saying you already tried bossing him, ordering him and you now know, that’s not in the manual that’s not how it will go. So we thought while you still have a full head of hair, we would interject and show you what is fair, to assume or to expect or by chance to find. He has a lot going for him but none of them is a brilliant mind.

Now this simple lad is honest and stout, but you guessed it he will do nothing if you shout. I know, I know it’s just so unfair, how could the provider show such lack of care. He does have unlimited power and great unconscious ken, but he is from the merest house of men.

A well such a tale to tell, of how a bint found herself in hell. What you dispute the label, from such a scented painted living fable. Time to put your cards on that mythical table. So trapped in the depths of hell, and honest you tripped, you fell or you just were tricked. No you can’t claim coercion and yes we know your ticked.

Tapping your feet, glaring and maybe the threats and lies, say you’re not that honest, and the tale is thick with lies.

So the games afoot and we are on our way, now we will all see if you are as good as they say. The pace is heavy and it demands a lot, you have enough time to show what you’ve got. The trail is cold and the scent is gone, and the idiot wants to make a camp and sing some song. Was that an expletive, what the f@#k is going on.

Still this is a fabled tale, about an impossible quest that cannot fail. So when the sun is high the camp is packed now get on your way, You know where your going and you never listen to a word he’ll say. The walk is pleasant and the weather is fine, the pace does slacken and lunch calls with the promise of wine. The day has the charm to sooth your mood, and when it shines it makes you both feel good.

As time goes by you both grow close and start to play, before much longer you’ll hang on every word he’ll say. If you close your eyes and down some wine, damn but he’s beginning to look real fine. As he overcomes all tests, guarding camp and overcoming villains will bring out his best. My how you will chuckle at life’s little jest when you see the final joke. He is no hero just a regular bloke.