Daily Archives: December 3, 2010

No Fairy Tale

What the Shrek

Hello Princess Fiona, hate to be the bearer of bad news but…an imp has mucked you over wake up and take a look, it’s not your script it’s a comedy book. Yeah this clunky knight, has been substituted for a heroes worthy might. And it must be said the plot isn’t very sane and yeah he’s verging on the wrong side of very plain.

I know he isn’t too bright, but if you pose him and just set him right. He can be an attractive centre piece, but do remember he is on loan and keep up the payments on his lease. It goes without saying you already tried bossing him, ordering him and you now know, that’s not in the manual that’s not how it will go. So we thought while you still have a full head of hair, we would interject and show you what is fair, to assume or to expect or by chance to find. He has a lot going for him but none of them is a brilliant mind.

Now this simple lad is honest and stout, but you guessed it he will do nothing if you shout. I know, I know it’s just so unfair, how could the provider show such lack of care. He does have unlimited power and great unconscious ken, but he is from the merest house of men.

A well such a tale to tell, of how a bint found herself in hell. What you dispute the label, from such a scented painted living fable. Time to put your cards on that mythical table. So trapped in the depths of hell, and honest you tripped, you fell or you just were tricked. No you can’t claim coercion and yes we know your ticked.

Tapping your feet, glaring and maybe the threats and lies, say you’re not that honest, and the tale is thick with lies.

So the games afoot and we are on our way, now we will all see if you are as good as they say. The pace is heavy and it demands a lot, you have enough time to show what you’ve got. The trail is cold and the scent is gone, and the idiot wants to make a camp and sing some song. Was that an expletive, what the f@#k is going on.

Still this is a fabled tale, about an impossible quest that cannot fail. So when the sun is high the camp is packed now get on your way, You know where your going and you never listen to a word he’ll say. The walk is pleasant and the weather is fine, the pace does slacken and lunch calls with the promise of wine. The day has the charm to sooth your mood, and when it shines it makes you both feel good.

As time goes by you both grow close and start to play, before much longer you’ll hang on every word he’ll say. If you close your eyes and down some wine, damn but he’s beginning to look real fine. As he overcomes all tests, guarding camp and overcoming villains will bring out his best. My how you will chuckle at life’s little jest when you see the final joke. He is no hero just a regular bloke.